


How did we end up here, in this valley of secrets?

by the_milky_way



Series: 25 Days of Buck and Eddie [20]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: 25 Days of Fic, Abby is a friend, Breaking Up & Making Up, Canon Divergent in some aspects, Christopher Diaz Has Two Dads, Dad!Buck, Established Relationship, Evan "Buck" Buckley as a Dad, Evan "Buck" Buckley is Christopher Diaz's Parent, M/M, Married Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, POV Evan "Buck" Buckley, Prompt Fic, Secret Relationship, Secretly Married Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Worried Evan "Buck" Buckley, canon compliant otherwise, firefam finds out, prompts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:07:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28201353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_milky_way/pseuds/the_milky_way
Summary: They should have told them. Or at least they should have told Bobby. Because if they had Buck wouldn’t be desperately searching for an explanation as to why they need to go by Christopher’s school right now.or:Buck and Eddie have a secret. Christopher getting a little sick at school is sort of the catalyst for it no longer remaining a secret.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Series: 25 Days of Buck and Eddie [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2036098
Comments: 22
Kudos: 503
Collections: 9-1-1 Tales





	How did we end up here, in this valley of secrets?

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt for Day 20:
> 
> "Love"
> 
> Concerning the canon compliance, please see the end notes.

_Early morning starts to shifts are miserable, especially if he has to do them in his own. He has to get out of bed alone, has to drink his first coffee on his own and only gets a very light kiss when he sneaks back into the bedroom to say goodbye._

_“Love you. Be careful,” is sent along, though, and it makes him smile._

_“Love you, too. See ya tonight.”_

_They'll be seeing either other ealier than that. But they don't know it_

_The day is only starting and no one ever can predict what the future holds._

+++

The truck is loud around him. With the engine’s noise and Chim’s banter towards the rest of the crew Buck has a hard time understanding the voice at the other end of the line. Sure, phone calls are frowned upon during shift but this is an emergency and he said as much to Bobby. He only answered when he saw Bobby nod in understanding.

“I know. Yeah. No, don’t worry. I’ll handle it. Say hi for me, will you? Yeah, me, too.”

Hanging up is harder than he thought it would be. Especially when it’s about Christopher and Eddie telling him that he needs to be picked up from school for not feeling good. A shot of panic went through him, hot and then cold before he registered that Eddie sounded calm enough for it not to be an emergency. Still, his heart is pounding a little harder now. 

Never before was he the one to get Chris like that. Sure, he brought Chris to and got him after school but he’s never had to get him in the middle of a school day. Usually it’s Eddie. They call Eddie first, which is something they had agreed on. But today Eddie is with Abuela at the hospital, and is her ride back home, so he can't leave her there. So Buck will try and go.

He slips his phone back into the pocket it usually stays in during calls and then he becomes aware of all the eyes on him. Hen’s look is curious while Chim is outright staring. Buck doesn’t dare to look up front because he knows Bobby’s turned in his seat. Eddie isn’t there today, therefore can’t help Buck or shield him from the curiosity that has taken over the truck’s cabin. He’s on his own this time.

“Everything good, Buck?” Even over the headset Buck can hear the concern in Bobby’s voice. He just needs a bit more time to come up with an adequate answer because right now he’s drawing a blank. Like completely. They should have gone against the higher ups. They should have told them. Or at least they should have told Bobby. Because if they had Buck wouldn’t be desperately searching for an explanation as to why they need to go by Christopher’s school right now. 

And Bobby is still waiting for an answer.

“I… Can we… Do we have time for a detour? If not, can you let me out somewhere? I can take a cab or an Uber. And I promise I’ll be back at the station in no time. It’s just... It’s a family emergency. And I know I shouldn’t let private things meddle with the job but there’s no one else right and I need to go...” 

He’s taking a deep breath ready to plead some more when Bobby interrupts. He doesn’t sound angry or exasperated with Buck, so he takes it as a good sign.

“Slow down, Buck. We have time. I took us off for the next hour since we need to clean the truck. We have a bit of a buffer.”

The sigh that escapes him, the way his stomach drops in relief, it’s so startling that Buck slumps back into his seat. Bobby trusts him, believes that something important is going on. His phone vibrates with a message. Eddie called ahead, so they know Buck’s coming for Christopher. 

“Thanks, Cap,” Buck manages to breathe into the headset, then remembers that they need the address as well and gives that out, too. He ignores Hen and Chim’s eyes on him, tries to calm himself down and just stares out of the window. No one says anything, for which he is really grateful because right now he wouldn’t even know what to say. 

When the truck comes to stop outside Chris’ school Buck ignores Bobby’s questioning look, Hen’s raised eyebrow and Chim’s mutter “what now?” and jumps out as soon as it’s safely possible. Chris is already waiting at the usual pick up point, looking a little pale maybe even shakey on his crutches but his eyes are wide at the sight of the truck and there is a smile present. So not an emergency then, just precaution. The rock that falls off Buck’s chest is bigger than he’d anticipated. 

“Buck!” Chris gets out before his smile gets too wide again.

He’s on his knees in front of Christ and the teacher waiting with him before he knows it.

“Hey buddy. Heard you aren’t feeling too well. What’s up with that?” Buck gives Christopher a onceover, hugs him close before he just holds on to the boy all the while still kneeling.

“Just a little achy. Not bad. But they called dad. He called you?”

“Yep. He couldn’t just leave Isabel all on her own when he knows I’ll do everything I can for our superman.” He gives Christ a little squeeze at the side, a few tickles as well and sighs in relief when the boy laughs and doesn’t flinch in pain or anything.

“He is a little warm, nothing major. But he fell asleep during recess and said his legs hurt. So we thought it better to call. We didn’t know Eddie would be busy and we had your schedule,” teacher says, sounding apologetic which Buck can’t let stand.

“No. It’s fine. Don’t worry. Thank you for taking care of him. Does he need to do any homework for missing today?” Buck gets up from the ground, grabs Chris' backpack from the teacher and then swings the boy himself into his arms and settles him against his hip. He takes the crutches as well.

Chris immediately buries his face in Buck’s neck, slings his arms around it, too. He does feel a little warm there. Buck hopes it won’t turn into a bout of flu or something similar. Sometimes Chris’ growing pains are accompanied by a slight fever as well. So maybe it’s that.

“No. He’s fine. He was ahead already. And it’s Friday. Get better, Christopher and I hope to see you on Monday.”

“Thanks, Miss Gerard,” Chris manages to get out before he’s hiding against Buck again.

“Thank you, Jennifer, have a good weekend.”

“You, too Buck. Bye Christopher.” With that the teacher turns to head back into the school and Buck’s stealing himself to face his team. 

His team that he has completely ignored from the second they arrived. He checks on Chris again, only to see that the boy has his eyes closed and is about to fall asleep. Then he turns towards the parked truck and sees Bobby leaning against one of its doors while Chim and Hen are hanging out of the windows.

Buck makes his way back to them slowly, mindful of the swinging backpack and crutches in his hand and the child on his hip. He looks at Bobby first naturally. This needs to be cleared with the boss and nobody else.

“This is Christopher. He isn’t feeling so great, so would it be okay if he stayed at the station for an hour? I have someone picking him up then. Just, not now. I can be the man behind if that’s okay.”

Eddie had messaged he’d pick Chris up after Abuela is safely back home. Carla has a day off and is out of town, so that isn’t an option either. Buck could call in sick if Bobby doesn’t okay him staying at the station. And that would raise even more questions. Not that Buck won’t have to answer a ton of them once they were back anyway. 

“Are we going in the truck, papa?” Christopher’s timing is impeccable. He rarely calls Buck that, only when he's tired or feeling like he needs the reassurrance that a parental figure is there. Buck ignores the questioning gasps coming from inside the truck.

Buck only has to direct the question towards Bobby, which he does with widening his own eyes a little. It’s a bit unfair, too. Playing his puppy dog eyes like this but it works because Bobby nods.

“Yes, kiddo, we are.”

“Cool,” Chris even manages to open his eyes when Buck maneuvers him into the cabin and buckles him into one of the seats. Incidentally it’s Eddie’s and Buck vows to ask Hen for the picture she has just taken. 

“Buck?”

He looks up when Bobby addresses him, waiting for the decision his captain surely has made by now.

“It’s okay to have him for a while. I’ll clear it with command.”

“Thank you, Bobby. That means a lot.”

With another nod Bobby turns back around and directs Anders to start the truck and find a good way home. Buck stows Chris’ backpack and crutches under the seat, buckles himself in and checks Chris' forehead for temperature again. Still a little warm but not going up. Then he puts a headset over the boy’s ears and laughs when Chris goes all wide-eyed in wonder again. He is more alert now, too. Checking the inside of the truck out before he grins at Buck in excitement.

“He is the Captain?” The boy asks all innocent but loudly through the microphone. But Bobby only laughs and watches them through the rearview mirror.

“Yep. He is. That’s Bobby. And you are sitting across from Hen. And next to her is Chim. We are working together.”

Hen waves at Chris, soft smile on her lips and the always present curious look in her eyes. Chim, though, is openly staring like he can’t really comprehend what’s going on, how Buck ended up with a kid. And really, Buck doesn’t want to know what kind of scenarios he’s coming up with in his mind right now.

“What is it with firefighters naming their kids Christopher?” Is what Chim asks in the end, sounding so profoundly puzzled that Buck swallows the sort of hysterical laugh that’s rising within him. He does snort at Hen’s very exaggerated eye-roll, though. 

Thankfully Chris is already on his way to falling asleep again, otherwise Buck’s sure there would have been questions about other kids being named like him at the station. And honestly? That conversation should better happen without little ears present and not in a moving fire truck.

When they are back at the station Buck manages to get Chris out of the seat and up into the loft without waking him. He settles him on one of the couches at the far end of the loft and leaves Hen to watch him while he gets his things out of the truck. He texts Eddie on the way back up. Tells him that Chris is okay just a little under the weather and that Bobby okayed him staying at the station. Eddie in return lets him know he’ll be there in about 40 minutes.

Buck retrieves Chris’ bottle from his backpack and refills it with the juice he knows Eddie always keeps stocked at the station because he loves it, too. After he has placed it on the coffee table he sinks down into the couch next to a peacefully sleeping Christopher. There’s a blanket covering now and Hen’s sitting in the armchair facing them.

“That was Eddie on the phone earlier,” she says without preamble. Straightforward and not a question either. Buck swallows, sinks further into the cushions and just nods when he sees Bobby and Chim settling into the other chairs in their little nook.

“How long have you been together?” Bobby’s watching him tuck the blanket further up Chris' body when the boy shivers a little. “Must be a while when he’s already calling you papa.”

“Five years, with interruption.” It’s not like he has to hide it anymore. They all know that something is going on here. 

“Jesus, Buck. I was going for a few months. But years even? What’s this all about?” Bobby sounds a little disappointed there. Like Buck’s been lying to him all this time. And in a way, that’s sort of true. He doesn’t want to face that conversation without Eddie, though. He needs Eddie for this.

“Can we wait with that until Eddie’s here? I just don’t want to do this without him.”

“Eddie coming to get him?” Hen asks softly, to take away the blow of disappointment and accusation in the air.

“Yeah. Abuela is back home and he’s taking Chris back to ours.” It’s a slip but Buck can’t bring himself to regret it. It’s out there now. He doesn’t have to watch his words any longer. 

“Now I feel really stupid about my ealier question,” Chim pipes up and it cracks some of the tension. It has Bobby smiling, Hen snorting and Buck actually laughing a little. 

It’s okay. They are okay for the time being. So when Bobby gets up to make some food and Chim follows to assist Buck doesn’t think they are trying to get away from him. Hen stays where she is, looks at him for a minute or two and then ropes him into a discussion about nighttime rituals. Yeah, Buck doesn’t know either but he’s part of it now. Like he belongs into the privileged group of parents and co-parents. Which he does, he realizes later.

There is no call in the time it takes for Eddie to arrive. His timing is as impeccable as his son’s as Bobby has food ready and is serving it on the couch table. Buck appreciates it, as it shields them a little from the rest of the house and lets him be close to Christopher. Eddie crouches down in front of Chris first, checks his temperature but lets him stay asleep for now. Eddie knows a talk is imminent and it’s better to have it with his son out of the picture so to speak. Because Chris sleeps very deeply, only a few things actually can wake him and talking people has never been one of them.

When Eddie moves to sit next to Buck he leans in for a soft kiss though. Buck’s a little surprised because Eddie has never been too keen on PDA but he smiles back when Eddie softly adds “Thanks for getting him.” 

Then Eddie turns to Bobby: “Thank you as well, Cap. For letting Buck get him. I know we owe you an explanation.”

“Well, let’s hear it while we eat.” 

Buck grabs a sandwich, and presses a little close to Eddie. He knows Hen’s and Bobby’s eyes are following his every move, cataloguing their closeness now. He’s not sure how they should start their story when Eddie just plunges in and tells it like it is. 

“Buck and I… we aren’t just together. We are married.”

And there goes Chim’s ability to breathe. Thankfully he only snorts the water through his nose and doesn’t actually choke on it.

“You are what?” Chims almost shrieks, only catches himself last minute when his eyes fall on Chris’ sleeping form.

“Why don’t I know this?” Bobby asks, face neutral, not giving anything away. Buck still feels like a chided child, though.

“Don’t know. It’s in our paperwork. Buck’s address is even the same as mine.” Eddie shrugs as though they haven’t done anything wrong. Buck’s not sure this is the best way to go about it. So he grabs onto Eddie’s hand, asks without words if he can take over. His husband just sighs then, nods and steals another soft kiss. This is sort of nice. To be able to do it.

“Bobby, I know this must come as a blow but it hasn’t been entirely our decision. And we never wanted to deceive you or anything. When I applied at LAFD we weren’t married yet. And when it happened, Eddie was in the middle of going through the academy. HR asked us to keep it quiet as not to steer comments about favoritism. And Eddie didn’t tell me he’d be at the 118. Seeing him here that first day... Let’s just say I was a little pissed.”

“A little? I had to sleep on the couch that night.” Eddie actually pouts which draws a laugh from Hen and a head shake from Bobby. 

“You deserved it. Anyway, HR and command want to keep it quiet until Eddie isn’t a probie anymore. Liability clauses or something like that. That’s at least the reason they gave us. And I thought, by now they would have told the Captains at least. You never said anything so we weren’t sure if we were allowed to. And Eddie’s only been here for a few months.”

Silence settles between the five of them, filled with actual eating and processing all the new information. Buck uses the break to check on Chris, relieved that the fever hasn’t risen and that the boy is still sleeping peacefully. When he turns back to the quiet conversation he’s greeted with a proud look from Bobby and a loving smile from his husband.

“I get it, the situation you two are in isn’t easy. But it’s a stupid reason and I’ll have a word with whoever is responsible at HR. I’ll check your paperwork but I guess that is in order. So I am good. And if there is… say an evening with a grill involved that happens to be at your house and if we are all invited to it, then I’ll consider it all settled,” Bobby’s words carry a finality that signals that the topic is done for him. He’s okay with it and that’s it. Easy as that. Buck’s a little stunned, can only nod when Eddie agrees to the conditions.

“Soooo.. How did you two meet then?” Of course it’s Chim who asks.

“In El Paso actually. I was on my way back from South America. Was bringing a friend home and wanted to go further west. My car broke down. Eddie was on leave. We met in a bar. Shannon had just served him the divorce papers. We got drunk, we hoo… “ Buck catches himself with a glance at Chris, grins at Eddie’s snort and shrugs. 

“Uh you know, did that… and sort of stayed together after. We fit. Chris liked me. I had no other plans. Just kinda worked. For a while at least.”

“What happened?” Hen sounds curious but in a way that doesn’t feel intrusive. She won’t dig if they choose not to answer and Buck appreciates it. Chim stays silent, watches them with a newfound curiosity, like he gets to know them all over again. And maybe it really is like that.

“My parents happened. Overbearing as they are, they thought Buck was too young to care for Chris, took over while I was on my second tour. Let him know that they didn't appreciate him being around. It was unfair of them to take it away and of me to burden him like that. It wasn’t his responsibility, but  
he took it.”

Eddie sighs, memories of that time hurt. Both of them. It wasn’t a good time, not for their family and not between them. But it happened, it is part of their history and while they are being honest with their friends this part belongs out in the open as well. It might explain some things their team is wondering about. But he needs Eddie to know something first.

“I loved Chris. Love him. It wasn’t and isn’t a burden.”

“I know, Evs. I know. Anyway, my parents sort of grabbed Chris and left Buck reeling. When I came home it was too late to fix that. He’d signed up for the SEALS training, was so determined to go and prove himself. I couldn’t hold him back so I let him go. It wasn't my best hour. We didn't talk for a while.”

“Back then, I never told him about flunking out and signing up at LAFD. My first few months here… uh Buck 1.0? That was me rebounding hard. I just… wanted to forget.”

He’s pulled into Eddie’s arms then, feels warm lips against his temple and smiles. They went through a lot only to get here and be together the way they always wanted to.

“How did you manage to find each other again?” Hen’s smiling now, at their display or the fact that they are here like that, Buck doesn’t know but it feels good to see that smile either way.

“Abby.”

“Abby?” Bobby sounds so shocked that Buck laughs.

“Yeah. She became a really good friend, talked me into reaching out to Eddie, because I clearly was all hung up on him. You know, the one that got away and all that. She made me see reason in a way. When you all thought she took me on a date, it was just her being nice and setting me up to meet Eddie after dinner. Kinda didn’t work out as you all know. And then she went and ghosted me in the end, which is still a shitty move even from a very good friend.”

Buck reaches for the glass on the table, suddenly parched and drained at the same time. Emotional talks always leave him feeling a little weird. He’s glad Eddie is there with him, moving a strong hand up and down his back. And he takes over again.

“When Buck called me after all that time, I was working myself into the ground, trying to provide and doing right by my parents. We did what him and Abby did, we talked. About everything. For hours. He got me to sign up for fire school. Had my abuela and tia wrapped around his little finger in no time when they managed to get ahold of him. It sounds stupid now but I proposed over the phone. Didn’t want to lose him again. We agreed on L.A., got married when he visited El Paso. The rest you all know about.”

“That’s still sorta romantic, Diaz.” Chim laughs but there’s a sparkle in his eyes that says he’s impressed.

“That’s Buckley-Diaz to you,” Eddie answers so deadpan that Buck has to hide his laughter against his shoulder. Hen’s snickering, too, while Bobby’s trying not to. He’s about to say something when the alarm sounds. They all groan out loud, so does Chris. But it’s the perfect signal for Eddie to get their son home and for Buck to get back to his job. Any more questions can wait till later.

Eddie kisses him before Buck sprints down the stairs.

“Love you. Be careful.

“Love you, too. See ya tonight.”

+++

_The future isn’t set in stone. No one knows what’s to come, what’s to happen. The one thing he does know is, that he won’t be alone in dealing with what life has to give him. He’s got a partner, a family, a son._

_He’s got love to give and love to receive._

_And in the end that’s all that really matters._

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in Season 2 and the firefam hasn't met Chris yet because Buck has introduced Carla when Eddie moved to L.A.. So there was no reason for him to take Chris when Abuela fell because Carla was already there. 
> 
> Abby was only a good friend in this.  
> Maddie hasn't shown up yet.
> 
> And this is all happening before the entire drama of Shannon dying (which I imagine she still does but didn't get back together with Eddie, because yeah no cheating here and Eddie really loves his husband), Buck's leg, the embolism and the tsunami.
> 
> There might be more of this but I'm not sure yet.
> 
> As usual, my mistakes and all that...  
> Thank you, A.  
> <3


End file.
